Do you believe in signs?

I never really thought that signs do exist, and I never bothered knowing the answer either. Until the day came, and made me realize that it is actually possible, and if FATE’s what you call it, and then maybe this was it.

One thing was obvious and I can truly remember, I envied people around me, and I wished I can be happy again, for whatever reasons I can be happy of, let me experience it again. This was the time; I prayed and asked for happiness.

It didn’t really matter much. Besides, I am happy with the life I have already, but I’ve always had sleepless nights that I wish I had the things that I’ve been wanting to have, and why is it that the things I yearn for aren’t just meant for me.

Maybe the right time just never really came to pass across me. I didn’t want to rush things. And I’ve always believed in Destiny, in Fate – that if one thing is meant to happen, then it will surely happen. And that my life has been planned before me.

My heart was sleeping for a long time. And it got broken the last time I thought it was awake. While it was broken, I’ve decided not to let anyone have it broke again.

I felt tired, my heart was.

Then he finally kept my hopes up. And I knew right away the answers to all the questions.

I’ve awakened, and in an instant I knew my heart was.

The answer was obvious right through my eyes. But I was still unsure.

And I asked myself, “Are you ready to be shattered?”

I don’t know. I never really was ready for anything. And I fear of this the most.

Falling then failing. I just don’t want to get hurt. And above this all, I don’t want to hurt you. Because soon, I know, I’ll be.

I don’t want you become a part of my past; because I can picture you and I together in the future. And mostly, I don’t want to hate you.

All inside me is fear. I fear everything that might actually happen.

In a moment, I know this could happen……..

And I’m not quite sure if I could take the risk again.

The risk of falling in love.

But no matter how fate can be unmistakable, it is even so crucial.

No matter how you say it is all in your hands, I can never control everything.

But I still have to stick with my principle. If he stays, the maybe he truly is the one.

Patience. Two years? Who knows? I can never predict our future. We alone can never dictate our fate.

But my hopes are big. They really are. And all these are hopes for the both of us.

And I’m hoping you are too.

Remember our pinky promise?

I won’t let you hold on to something that I know might hurt you in time.

This I mean is an assurance, that no matter how long it takes, whatever it takes, wherever you go, in one corner, you’ll always find your special place.

I’m hoping you could wait for me. Whatever and how long it’ll take.

This for us is important. And this will leave me with a lot of questions unanswered.

Hmm. .

Should I ask for another sign?